I'm sorry, but I'm not having it. This backyard belongs to a family of blackbirds and a robin. Go back to your house and eat kitty-chow, fat, brindled-grey pussycat. You're not welcome here- beautiful though you undoubtedly are.
As the cat disappears round the side of the house I notice the robin watching from high up in the bare branches of the hawthorn tree. He's not stupid. He knew.