July 16th, 2008

Back From The Optician

 I don't like going to the doctor or the dentist, but I've always enjoyed trips to the optician.

I've been going to the same firm for nearly twenty years. Ailz has been going since 1981. They used to have a premises in grungey old Glodwick but now they've moved to rather more upmarket Lees. 

They stock nice magazines. Today I got to browse through Harper's Bazaar. I played a little game with myself , trying  to identify the huge faces in the beauty ads. I scored Juliette Binoche, Nicole Kidman and Penelope Cruz. 

How old is Sharon Stone?  About 50? So how come they've got her looking like she's 20 years younger? Actually I know the answer to that. Digital Retouching.

The actual eye test is like a game too- a series of games.  I particularly like the one where you get to say how many little lights you can see flashing on and off in the box. The one where they puff air into your eyes is fun too- in a ghost trainy sort of a way.

I like it how my optician takes what seem like infinite pains, and makes me feel important.

Her name is Gail. She looks a bit like my sister and a bit like Glenda Jackson.

The good news is my eyes are as good (or as wonky) as they ever were. The other good news is I get to choose some new specs. All for free- all on the National Health! What I've gone for this time is a pair with heavy, black, plastic frames- very retro, very sixties, very Michael Caine- which make me look remarkably like my grandfather.