November 25th, 2007

Custard

And then there's custard.

Proper custard is concocted out of milk, egg yolk and sugar, but that's not what I'm talking about here. I'm talking about the economy version- which is a powder you mix with milk to create a thick, bright yellow glop which grows a skin if allowed to cool. The magic ingredient is cornflour. It masks the flavour of whatever you drop it on and tastes of nothing.  I mean, what exactly is the point? 

When I was a kid they smothered it on everything. Some kids (Ailz for example) got a taste for it and adopted it as a beloved comfort food. For me it's a symbol of oppression. 

Show me the tin- with its three happy tweety-birds- and I flip straight back to Cumnor House School with its Oliver Twist-like dining arrangements and its perpetually grim-faced headmaster. Why do people who hate children go into education? Maybe because there's nothing else they're good for. *sigh*.

I feel a rant coming on so I'll shut up.
 

Alfred Bird

Alfred Bird- the Birmingham chemist- who invented custard powder for a wife who loved custard but was allergic to eggs- Awwwww.