Ailz: You're going to the hairdresser.
My Mother: (In Lady Bracknell mode) The hairdresser!!?
Ailz: For a perm
My Mother: (Even more Bracknell) A perm!!!?
Ailz: Of course we could always see about getting someone in to do your hair at home.
My Mother: (Unimpressed) It's a thought.
Me: Alternatively Ailz could give you a buzz cut with the electric razor.
For some reason no-one took that last suggestion seriously.
She doesn't like going out. She really doesn't. Since she last rode in the car she's lost the ability to fix her own seatbelt. The perm took two hours. Ailz and I went round the charity shops and had a cup of tea in the Village Cafe. When I was paying for the perm my mother called me "darling." I don't think she's ever called me that before. "Darling" was what she called my father and no-one else.