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Tony Grist

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Click! [Oct. 20th, 2013|09:55 am]
Tony Grist
Some men in masks board an underground train. A woman is tracking them. They carry identical attache cases. Are they suicide bombers? They catch sight of her. She punches the alarm. All hell breaks loose.

And my mother switches the TV off.

As I expected she would. Anything too fruity; click. Anything unfamiliar: click. Her remote, her rules.

"I don't know what that was," she says in an affronted tone.

"Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D" I say.

"How on earth do you know?"

"Because they just told us."

We've had variants on this conversation many times before. Only now there's a difference. It's not that she won't pay attention, it's that she can't.

I find it hard to accept that we've crossed that line.
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Comments:
[User Picture]From: idahoswede
2013-10-20 10:43 am (UTC)
Ray has got there with his mother now too. She can't watch any politics shows anymore because she thinks they're yelling at her and it upsets her. She used to love her politics shows.
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[User Picture]From: poliphilo
2013-10-20 11:32 am (UTC)
My mother sticks with reality TV- animals and cakes and houses. She can cope with those. She can't follow anything with a story.
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[User Picture]From: arielstarshadow
2013-10-20 03:14 pm (UTC)
I really cannot say how much this scares me. My mother watches things like those afternoon court shows and "Dr. Phil" and I shudder. She never would have watched those things years ago.

She did start watching a lot of science and nature shows because she loves those, but she didn't drop the utterly banal stuff. I had hoped that, once we decided to start paying for cable TV again, she would move on to better things.

I am frightened that I will one day be the same way.

ETA: you know? I keep remembering our dear friend Jackie - that's how I want to be when I get older.

Edited at 2013-10-20 03:15 pm (UTC)
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[User Picture]From: poliphilo
2013-10-20 04:09 pm (UTC)
I've taken steps to avoid becoming a couch potato. Last time we were home I got rid of the TV.

I miss Jackie.
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[User Picture]From: arielstarshadow
2013-10-20 04:49 pm (UTC)
I miss her, too.
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[User Picture]From: chochiyo_sama
2013-10-20 10:02 pm (UTC)
I miss her as well. I was just thinking of her the other day and wishing I had one of her lovely posts to read about rotting raccoons or a plastic doll found in a hedge or about what was blooming in the garden.

I hope she is having an utterly amazing afterlife--perhaps as a garden fairy.
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From: athenais
2013-10-22 02:06 pm (UTC)
I miss her a lot. She told such wonderful stories, I am still sad they are all finished now.
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[User Picture]From: suemars
2013-10-20 11:46 am (UTC)

my mom...

calls to see if I called her, whens shes called me the day before. we'll talk for an hour and she doesn't remember any of the conversation.
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[User Picture]From: poliphilo
2013-10-20 12:34 pm (UTC)

Re: my mom...

Sounds familiar. :(

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From: artkouros
2013-10-20 01:10 pm (UTC)
I bought my dad every variant of every old western TV show, and we have a channel that's all shows from the 50's and 60's. He loved it.
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[User Picture]From: poliphilo
2013-10-20 04:07 pm (UTC)
I loved those when I was a boy, but I don't think I could bear to watch them now.

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[User Picture]From: pondhopper
2013-10-20 03:08 pm (UTC)
It is very hard to accept and it also means our level of caring has to adapt to the circumstances of a fragile mind.
That's hard...I'm so sorry.
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[User Picture]From: poliphilo
2013-10-20 04:12 pm (UTC)
When she was merely being willful I could be angry with her, but that's no longer an appropriate response.
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[User Picture]From: wyrmwwd
2013-10-20 03:40 pm (UTC)
The lady that I work for is completely baffled by her cell phone. We have spent hours trying to teach her how to use it. She has a hard time with understanding that charging her phone is not the same as using her minutes (which she doesn't have to worry about anymore, because I added her to my account). She has a hard time with understanding that "voice mail" is just like her answering machine, except that it is in her cell phone. She keeps going back to thinking that if it is voice MAIL, it must be a text message, but text messaging is WAY too complicated for her. When her cell phone rings, she typically just stares at it, not knowing what to do. (she still uses her home phone just fine). If she is out, she typically can't remember how to use her cell phone to call someone and will ask a stranger for help (a practice that just terrifies me). And, when she went on a trip last month, she called 5 of her friends and left messages for them, but she left all of the messages on her own voice mail. I still don't have any idea how she did that.

This woman was brilliant. She was the minister of a HUGE Methodist congregation for over 50 years. The cell phone completely baffles her.
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[User Picture]From: poliphilo
2013-10-20 04:17 pm (UTC)
Oh God, that sounds like me. My cell phone terrifies me. I refuse to use it. If it rings I hand it to Ailz.

This is partly technophobia, partly a deep-seated resentment at the way it impinges on my privacy. I hate the idea of people calling me when I'm out and about.
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[User Picture]From: wyrmwwd
2013-10-20 04:27 pm (UTC)
This is completely different from her. She WANTS to be able to use her cell phone. All of her friends have them, and she sees them talking and texting and wants to join in the fun! Some of her friends have smart phones, and those are completely out of the question for her.

I don't have a land line anymore. I only use my cell phone. I have the people that I know programed in, so if I get a call, if their names don't show up, I don't answer. If I don't know you, leave a message and tell me who you are, or I'm not going to talk to you.

I don't feel compelled to answer it every time it rings. I won't answer if I'm in the middle of a conversation with someone, or if I just don't feel like it. I feel like I am more in control with my cell phone, not less.

But that comes with being comfortable with the technology.
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[User Picture]From: wyrmwwd
2013-10-20 11:19 pm (UTC)
I'm going to look into that. She has now lost her phone all together.
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[User Picture]From: poliphilo
2013-10-20 08:38 pm (UTC)
I've never liked phones. I use them as little as possible. I hate carrying one around with me.
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[User Picture]From: chochiyo_sama
2013-10-20 10:07 pm (UTC)
Today, on the way home after lunch and a movie with my mom and aunt and uncle, we went by an auction place where they had a line of brightly colored golf carts--painted in sticky-sweet jelly bean colors.

Pointing at the pink one I say, jovially and facetiously, "My birthday is coming up, and that bright pink golf cart would make a lovely gift!"

My mom responded bitterly and hatefully, "Where in the hell do you think you'd keep THAT?"

Me, trying to keep the just-for-fun vibe I started with, "As long as I am fantacizing, I'll just add a large, roomy garage to my fantasy."

I get so sick of her being rude, nasty, and shitty to me all the time.
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[User Picture]From: poliphilo
2013-10-21 07:41 am (UTC)
My parents were never nasty to me. They just ignored me- and sent me off to be expensively educated at a place far from home.
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