Distinctly Odd

For months now Dot has been waking in the early hours of every morning to hear a cuckoo clock strike twelve- only she doesn't own a cuckoo clock. In between each of the "cuckoos" comes something that sounds like a snatch of recorded speech- too muffled to decipher. The noise is loudest in the vicinity of the cupboard that houses the boiler.

None of us has the least idea what is going on.