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Tony Grist

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Feelings [Jun. 2nd, 2012|02:41 pm]
Tony Grist
I lose my temper once every two or three years. The last time was just after the funeral; Fabi had broken something (of no intrinsic value) and then given me a smug smile. I roared at him. Even as I was roaring I began to feel ashamed. 

Of course it was really Eric I was angry with. 

Yesterday I felt tired- to the point of wobbliness. Today I feel depleted.
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Comments:
[User Picture]From: veronica_milvus
2012-06-02 02:58 pm (UTC)
All part of the healing process. Be nice to yourself.
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[User Picture]From: poliphilo
2012-06-02 03:22 pm (UTC)
Thanks. I'll do my best...
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[User Picture]From: clindau
2012-06-02 04:18 pm (UTC)
And very belated sympathies to you on Eric's passing.
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[User Picture]From: poliphilo
2012-06-02 04:31 pm (UTC)
Thank you
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[User Picture]From: daisytells
2012-06-02 07:44 pm (UTC)
Sometimes people yell at kids. My own grandfather, who I loved very dearly, yelled at me more than once or twice, not without grounds for doing so.
I'm glad you got through the funeral OK. Now (to quote Valentine Michael Smith, "healing is..."
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[User Picture]From: poliphilo
2012-06-03 09:19 am (UTC)
My grandfather was a yeller. Maybe I've inherited his temper.
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[User Picture]From: daisytells
2012-06-02 07:48 pm (UTC)
It just occurred to me that when my own Dad died, I was numb during most of the funeral. Afterward when we got back to our own home, exhausted from the long trip and the funeral ado, my husband and I fell into bed and he wrapped his arms around me without a word. I fell asleep feeling comforted for the first time since Dad's final bout with pneumonia had begun. I recommend hugs and sleep for Ailz - and for you, too, Tony.
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[User Picture]From: poliphilo
2012-06-03 09:20 am (UTC)
Thanks.
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[User Picture]From: michaleen
2012-06-03 10:09 am (UTC)
Isn't it generally worse in the days after the funeral? Until then, there are things to do and the support of others, with well-marked channels in which the emotions may flow acceptably. Only later comes the sorting it all out, too often alone.

I inherited a very strong tendency to anger. It's mostly under control. I don't like it.
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[User Picture]From: poliphilo
2012-06-03 10:19 am (UTC)
Ailz and her mother have gone off to church this morning- which is one way of dealing with the situation, I suppose.
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[User Picture]From: michaleen
2012-06-04 10:32 am (UTC)
This is what religion's for, isn't it? As she says up thread, be good to yourself. You've been through more than you realize.
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